Posted 4 weeks ago
Mon 21 Oct, 2024 12:10 PM
We're a few weeks into the term and you've probably started settling in to your new environment and routine. Maybe you've found your favourite gym, favourite park, or favourite coffee shop, or you've joined some societies and met some great people. Maybe you've made loads of friends, or maybe it's been more difficult to connect.
When you start university, everyone tells you that meeting people will come easily: "just join societies and make friends with your flatmates!" However, this isn't everyone's experience. Our Residential Assistants - students like yourself! - have shared some of the trials and tribulations they experienced, as well as their top tips for making friends at Queen Mary.
A group of friends at Aspire Point
Lily, 1st year Mathematics
When I first started at Queen Mary, I didn’t really know how to meet people outside of classes and societies. But every morning, I’d grab a coffee from this tiny café near campus, and I started noticing the same girl there at the same time—always with a pile of books, looking equally tired. One day, the café was packed, and there was only one free table. I awkwardly asked if I could sit with her, and we just started chatting about how we both kept ending up there. Turns out, we had a lot in common—same course, same hectic schedule—and now we always grab coffee together before our morning lectures. It's funny how something as simple as a regular coffee run turned into a solid friendship! I guess my advice is to not be shy and try to make the first move as much as you can as you never know what a short conversation could lead to… for me it was meeting one of my best friends!
Rimsha, 2nd year Dentistry
For me, as an extremely shy person, making friends seemed really hard. That’s why I made it my mission for first year to put myself out there, introduce myself to people, and start a conversation with them. I did this during icebreaker events with my course and also with societies that were hosting some type of icebreaker event. It did feel daunting at first but I eventually got the hang of it and now talking to new people is not a scary thing anymore. Another thing I did was when I saw my flatmates in the kitchen I would start up a conversation with them and ask them about their day. This helped me break out of my shell and now I have an amazing group of friends and am no longer the shy person I once was, all because I started talking first.
Alana, 3rd year Law
I made friends in my first year by joining QMUL freshers group chats on Instagram and Facebook before I came to uni. I was then able to find 3 other girls in my course and accommodation building through this group chat. I’m in third year now, and I’m still living with the same 3 girls.
I also really recommend joining societies to make friends, specifically sports. I hadn’t played netball for years when I joined the QM netball society but the girls there welcomed me with open arms, and a year later I was captain of a team and in the committee. I absolutely love netball and all of the wonderful friends I have made there!! If sports is not your thing, there are so many other societies to choose from. The girls in the Taylor Swift society are so lovely and fun, and the socials they run are always amazing! I am also part of a few academic societies such as the law society and Pro Bono society. There really is a society for everyone, and they are perfect for finding like-minded people to spend time with!
Alessandra, 3rd year Biomedical Sciences
After a rugby injury, I decided to try something new and joined rowing last year. Although it wasn’t my passion at first, I wanted to challenge myself—and I’m so glad I did. Over time, I grew to love being on the water, but what really stood out was this girl I kept running into. We just clicked in a way that’s hard to explain, like we were always on the same wavelength. As the year went on, we became close, eventually rowing in the bow pair for our final sessions. Our bond only grew stronger outside of training, and now we’re both social secs for the rowing team this year. I feel incredibly lucky to have met her!
Deema, 2nd year Senior Status Law
A couple weeks ago, I gathered the courage to attend a football taster session, hoping to not only get back into sports but also meet new people. I'm so glad I did, as it gave me the chance to connect with individuals from different programs and years. The very next day, I met up with two of them for coffee between lectures, and it turned out that one of them was taking the same module as me! Now, we meet regularly for coffee at the Ground Café before our lecture. I’d really encourage you to explore different societies or sports that may interest you, even if you’ve never tried them before. You never know, you might meet some amazing people with similar interests. If you're hesitant to commit to a full sport, you can always drop into the "Get Active" sessions at Qmotion for just £2 each time—perfect if you're looking for something low-pressure but still fun!
Some friendships come more easily than others, but it's always important to remember that friendship will come. Break out of your comfort zone and you never know what you'll find, or what wonderful connections are waiting for you!
